Settle the frick down!
We all want to be good parents and take care of our kids, however, there is too much of a good thing with being involved. There is a fine line between being a caring parent and hovering too much (known as being a Helicopter Parent.) And yes, I admit…I do hover. A lot. But, I’m working on…well…not hovering so much.
Here are some things you want to avoid doing:
If you find yourself always saying “No” to your kids, you may want to think about why. Granted, the world seems like a scarier place today compared to when we grew up, but we have to allow our children the opportunities to become independent. It is natural to worry, but try to step back for a moment and say “Yes” sometimes when your kids ask you if they can do something they want to do.
Always Speaking Up
While this can be a hard one, you can’t always speak for your child. You don’t want to scare off your child’s teachers by being that parent who is always calling or asking for meetings. Our kids have to learn to speak up for themselves sometimes. Now if it is very important, then of course you may need to get involved. Just don’t get involved every time there is a minor problem.
Yes, maybe you tell yourself you are just ‘helping’, but we have all been there with that last minute project or assignment. There is nothing wrong with helping your child, but don’t take over. Even if the project is not ‘perfect’, don’t worry so much. Let your son or daughter be themselves and work in their own way.
Some Helicopter Parents don’t let their kids do anything where they can get dirty. Getting dirty and scraped knees are part of growing up. You don’t want your child to be afraid of doing things. Dirt washes off, so don’t obsess too much.
Give your child the chance to make decisions and learn from mistakes. Of course, it health or safety is involved, then you may need to step in. Let your kids know you are there for them, but don’t hover or smother them!
Too much hovering will lead to an insecure child and will probably end up with your child living in the basement in your house at the age of 50.