Do You Let Your Baby Cry It Out? The Debate

To let them cry or not to cry? That is the question.


When sleep training your baby, does letting them cry it out cause any damage to them down the road? Well, that depends on who you ask. Experts seem to have their own opinion about whether or not letting your baby cry it out is good or not. And it seems parents are divided on this subject as well.

Let me just say when my first baby cried (which was very rare..I actually had to poke her and rustle her from her sleep to make sure she was still breathing), I coddled her. I smooched her. I picked her up every second and made sure each of her basic needs at the time were met (diaper empty, belly full and there wasn’t built up gas in that tummy). Needless to say, there was no Cry It Out. Heck, at that time I don’t even think there was such thing as Cry It out.

What exactly is Cry It Out? The Cry It Out method involves putting a sleepy baby into their crib, with the goal of falling asleep on their own. Once you put your baby into their crib, give them hugs and kisses, say goodnight and exit the room. If they should start crying, you let them cry and eventually they will fall asleep. While this may be hard for some parents, it really is the only way to ensure they, as well as their baby, gets a good night’s sleep. Generally, it takes about 3 nights for this method to work, with the baby crying less each night. Essentially, your baby will learn to soothe himself to sleep each night at bedtime.


When should Cry It Out not be used? Cry It Out should not be used on newborns, babies who are sick or teething, babies who are hungry, babies who suffer with separation anxiety or parent with post-partum depression. Newborns don’t have sleep patterns that are mature enough to be meddled with and babies who are sick, teething, hungry or have separation anxiety are not physically or mentally strong enough to have their sleep pattern disturbed.

It is important to note that Cry It Out will not work the same for everyone. Just because your sister had success with the method for her baby, doesn’t mean it will work for you and your baby. If you try the Cry It Out method and after a few nights it doesn’t seem to be working, it is time to try another method.

The bottom line is that you, as a parent, knows what is best for your child. If letting your baby cry doesn’t feel right as a parent or you don’t think it is the right sleep training method for them, then follow your instinct and do what works for you and your baby.

Once I got to my 2nd and third baby, I’m not gonna lie. There was a bit of the Cry It out happening. I wasn’t so jumpy when it came to my baby letting the tears flow. There’s nothing wrong with working those lungs a bit!

So, what say you?


  1. I dont have any children, but have heard from my friends who do have kids about this issue. Crying it out seems to be the harder option, but worth it in the long run in helping your child self-regulate and soothe themselves.

  2. We never have done the cry it out method with our kids. I stay at home, and have always been pretty available to attend to their needs…that said we also fall into the attachment parenting realm, so I never really saw the need for them to cry it out. It is definitely a huge debate though!

  3. I did it for a little bit and I hated it, so it did not last very long. My son didn’t need it, but it did not work for my daughter at all and made things worse. She is the type of child to this day that needs human interaction.

  4. We did modified cry it out with both our kiddos. Once they were able to sleep through the night without waking to eat, we started sleep training. Now, they are both excellent sleepers at night and during nap. And I’m able to get solid rest so I can parent with more patience. Now that they can put themselves to sleep, we’re able to travel with them a lot easier.

  5. This is such a personal thing as some people don’t want to hear their child crying but then others don’t want their baby to think they can cry and every time someone will come to them. I’m sure when I’m a parent it will come naturally x

  6. Don’t have kids, but I watched my sisters and sister-in-law struggle with this decision and in the end they all just had to find a path that worked for them. I think each kid is different and it changes how you should handle things.

  7. I was told by a doctor to let my daughter cry it out. It did work, but I have heard of cases where the cry it out method didn’t work. I guess it is just up to the parent as to what they think will work.

  8. When my little girly cries its always for a reason, so I don’t like her cry it out. If she is crying its because she isn’t feeling well, she needs a change or she is teething. Other than that she never cries!

  9. I think you do need to let you baby learn to self-soothe at some point. It can be hard, but if they know you are going to come into their room at every cry, they will never be able to fall asleep on their own.

  10. definitely a struggle but we were quite lucky that our little guy loves sleep as much as we do! I used this method when he was about 12-18 months though when he went through a dodgy phase, it’s hard but also when you know there’s nothing wrong then giving them attention because of it is going to foster the same behaviour again. That being said it’s controversial and some don’t like it.

  11. I completely agree! We all parent differently and we should never let the opinions of others control how we raise our kids. It’s important to keep in mind that we are our kids parents and we know them better than any other individual!

  12. I have let my baby cry, as long as I knew that they weren’t in some kind of danger. We all parent differently and I don’t believe either style is wrong.

  13. We never let our oldest cry it out for anything. It’s been a bit different with our youngest daughter who is now two. But she’s also a different baby and hardly ever cries. We are all different and each child has different needs.

  14. I felt like I was different with each of my kids. Some of them I let cry it out a bit longer than their sibling. At the end of the day it’s what each kid needs.

  15. I didn’t when my daughter was little, but we also didn’t have any major issues with my daughter like a lot of people have. Thank goodness lol

  16. When my kids were little I would let them cry it out. At times it was really hard to hear them scream though.

  17. As someone who doesn’t have children, I don’t actually know what I would do until I have one for myself. There is a lot of debate about this, but like you say it is a personal choice.

  18. We definitely let them cry it out until it got too much to take. There is a point where we have always gone and gotten them.

  19. I knew a doctor that used the cry it out method for his children when they were babies and it worked well for him and his wife. Personally, I try not to weigh in these type of subjects too much since everyone has a different parenting style. 🙂

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